Posts Tagged ‘marathons’

I am ready.

November 7, 2011

omorrow, November 8th, I will be starting the first of 12 chemotherapy cycles to address the metastatic nodules found in both my lungs. It will be my third time to go through this (colon in 2008 and liver mets in 2010) and it is not something I really wanted to do.  In fact, since finding out that my cancer is back again I have been dreading the day I go back for chemo. My journey has taken me to many twist and turns without knowing if ever I will be free of cancer.  I just go on one-step at a time savoring every opportunity given.

Last week, I was in Atlanta  for work and had the opportunity to bond with colleagues I have not seen for a while. I am glad I went there for it allowed me to renew friendships (Frank, Artie, Jim, and Henrik) and establish new ones (Bill and Anji). It boosted my confidence that after I am done with my treatments, given another opportunity, I may see them again.

Especially, Frank who finished the Frankfurt marathon last October 30 in very good time to qualify for Boston next year. I asked him to bring his medal so I can see, then he surprised me.

“Are you sure?”  I said, while admiring his medal.

“Why don’t you take it and wear it on the day of your chemo? When you want to give up (in your treatment), just look at it.” I was touched by the gesture.

I know runners and their medals. I have mine hanging in my bedroom as a reminder of the hardship and sweetness of finishing a marathon. Runners wear them with pride no matter what time they finish. In Frank’s case, the Frankfurt medal qualified him again to Boston; the most elite event among amateur runners. It is as close as I can get to making it to Boston.

I got to make it. I got to finish these treatments so I can get back out there, perhaps to Berlin and hook up with Frank in 2012. Something to look forward to.

I am ready. Even my cancer cells are ready. They are plump from eating wonderful chocolates by Ghirardelli after the weekend’s Hot Chocolate race. Cancer loves sugar, you know. Now that they are well-fed, it is time to line up against the wall and meet your destiny.  Die, suckers.  Hasta la vista, baby!

Danke. Salamat, Tak. Abhinandana. Thanks.

Me and Frank the Boston Qualifier


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My guardian angels

My guardian angels

January 10, 2010

My first chemo infusion is on Tuesday, January 12, or at least that is the intention.  Since recovering from chemoembolization, I have trying to gain strength and eat.  My friend ChrisL from Michigan City, IN sent me a ‘care package’ of high-protein drinks called Myoplex from EAS with 42g of protein.  It is Ensure on steroids!  So I have been drinking after going to the gym, thanks, Chris.

I also have to say thanks to Michael a.k.a MTS of Sunderland, UK for the beautiful calendar showing the beautiful sights of north east England.  Amazing.  (NOTE: Picture below is one of the images in the calendar) Been to UK before but never been to the north east.  I am always amazed at the generosity of people and it overwhelms me.

Sometimes it is not gifts received that overwhelm me but simple kindness and attention given by other people.  You know who you are and I am thankful as well.  I tell this to my wife and she says I have many guardian angels who care for me.  It helps knowing that you are out there.  Today, I felt tired.  I have been having difficulty sleeping due to stomach pains from gas and heartburn or maybe something else.  It is not good when you have issues like this and you are about to start chemo.

So I called my nurse Edith on a Sunday and she said she will put me in to see my oncologist, Dr. M tomorrow.  She suggested to take some antacid for the night.  I hate been sick.  I think of the six-months chemo session ahead of me and it scares me.  I know I have done it before but this is not exactly running a marathon.  The discomfort or pain is different and real.  The side-effects are what weakens the body and spirit.   There is no personal record to beat this time, you just want to finish in one piece.  I want to get it done and have a sense of normalcy, like others.  I want to be healthy again.

With your help I will get there, one mile marker at a time or one chemo cycle at a time.  I owe it all to my guardian angels.


Angel of the North - Tyne and Wear, England

Angel of the North - Tyne and Wear, England

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