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Just get me there.
March 1, 2014

LLife and death decisions are easy.  They are binary.  So when the doctor’s tell me I have to do chemo, I reluctantly do it or I die.  That’s the way I see things.  Of course, others may choose to let go because they do not have something or someone to live for.

There are decisions that are hard because they are personal.  Sending my mother home back to the Philippines is one of those hard decisions.  She left two weeks ago and the house is not the same: It is quiet.  I sent her home because, if anything happens to me, I don’t want her to see the end.  I know about mother’s instinct and all that, but I will be helpless to protect her.  It is much easier to carry on not worrying about her when the day comes.

I only want good memories for her to remember me.  I have plenty to keep me going, more than enough to get me to the next stage: The clinical trials (non-FDA approved drugs or experimental).

I am looking forward to my next appointment at University of Chicago Medicine.  The results of my genetic testing from Foundation Medicine are out and it identified one gene called RET that can unlock my cancer mystery.  The report also listed trial drugs that maybe appropriate for me.  All this is foreign to me, but my doctors are excited.  So if they tell me I have to do this and that, that is easy.  Just get me to the starting line and I will figure out how I will finish.

At the finish line, I know who will be there: You, my family and of course, mom.  It will be a sweet moment I look forward to because it is all worth all these years of struggle.

RET

RET Gene

Cheers.

P.S.  My next U of C appointment is on March 12.

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